This morning, our neighborhood was stirred up by the sudden piercing cries and screams of a 10-year-old girl inside a long vacant unit beside her family’s house.  “Kuya! kuya! kuya!…”

Neighbors ran to see what happened, and they were shocked to see her 13-year-old brother hanging from a rope tied to one of the exposed beams.

It appeared that the boy has been dead for hours. He must have died during  the night.

The immediate conclusion was that he killed himself. According to most of the stories that soon circulated, the boy has just gone home after running away for a few days, and must have been punished severely.

Several in the neighborhood say that the boy was always being scolded and was always ordered to do chores, barring him from playing.

What must have worsened the situation was that the boy was naturally quiet.  He may have not spoken about what he’s going through with his friends.

The mother of the boy is working abroad, earning for this boy and his two younger sisters.  She left the children with her parents because her husband was apparently irresponsible.

I came to know later that these three kids at one time were taken by the DSW from the husband because he neglected them when they were living with him in the province.

OFw parents are heroes.  They sacrifice.  They bear hours and hours of lonely work in foreign lands… for their children.

But they should ensure that their children are in good hands.  They should instruct their children how they can be contacted directly and easily in case there are problems.

Texting, calling and emailing are now affordable.  Even financially struggling neighbors are willing to lend their cell phone loads, especially if children are involved.  They should talk to their children directly and not always through certain people.

Who am I to judge the people who took charge of the boy?  They are good people too.  The boy is their own flesh and blood.

But why did the boy kill himself?

Most large banks now in the Philippines offer free Internet banking, and they offer lots of services that prompts you to say Wow.

However, in this article, I would describe only two, BPI Express Online and My BDO Internet Banking, because they’re the ones I use.

1. If you already have accounts with BPI and/or BDO, then you’ve
done the first step. Your savings account or checking account
would become the wallet from which you would get money to give
to your child weekly.

2. Next is to get an ATM card for your child, or ATM cards if you have more than one child to support.

If you get a regular ATM card, you are required to maintain a balance — 2,000 for a BDO account; 1,000 for a BPI Family account or 3,000 for a BPI account.

For most children, this maintaining balance is a temptation — a cake on the table ready to be consumed.

So the best option is to get a BPI Express Cash Card or a BDO Cash Card. Both of these ATM cards do not require a maintaining balance.

You can get a BDO Cash Card for only 120 pesos or a BPI Express Card for only 120 pesos also.

For OFWs, a better account is available — BDO Kabayan Savings. It only has a 100-peso maintaining balance, and it has other benefits too. More info for this account here.

OFWs can also get a BDO Remit Cash Card. More info on this here.

3. Then enroll your BPI savings or checking account with BPI Express Online or your BDO account with MyBDO Internet Banking.    You can enroll online and then print the filled out form to be submitted or sent to BDO or BPI. Or you can just go to your bank branch.

Just prepare your user name and password and be ready with your account number and your BDO or BPI cash card numbers.

4. After your Internet banking account is activated, you can plan and schedule when and how much money to put into your child’s cash card.

If your child needs 200 a day, you can reload your child’s cash card 1,200 or 1,500 every week. Just adjust the amounts when your child needs to pay the dorm or buy something.

Just tell your child that the minimum withdrawal for BPI Express Cash is 500 pesos and for BDO Cash Card, it is 200. Tell them to withdraw as much as possible from these banks’ ATMs to avoid ATM charges (around 10 pesos for each withdrawal).

5. For OFWs, Internet banking can save you remittance costs and
at the same time prevent your children from having access to large amounts of money, which can be tempting.  One-day millionaires among OFW children are common.

You don’t have to send money every month or every week. Just remit an adequate amount to your savings account and then transfer controlled amounts to your kids’ accounts as often as you like without paying any transfer fee.

For more details:

BPI Express Online

MyBDO Internet Banking

One of many things missed by OFW parents is everyday interaction with their children, including what their children are thinking about various things.

Well, yes, even non-OFW parents have difficulties in getting into the inner thoughts and feelings of their children.

One way for OFW and non-OFW parents to know more their children, especially teenagers is to encourage them to join the online site MyLot.

MyLot is free to join. Your daughter or son must be at least 16 years old. If your child has been using Friendster, then this is a very easy site for your child to explore.

Simply, MyLot is an easy-to-use question and answer site. Your child can post a question, or she or he can answer questions. Don’t worry about pornography or online violence; it is prohibited by MyLot.

I just recently discovered this “knowing more our children” as one of the benefits of MyLot when my teenager daughter joined the site. At first, she just joined because she heard she can earn money from it. Later, she found out she can also improve her English writing skills on the site.

Your children can develop confidence writing on MyLot because many of the young people and adults writing are non-native English speakers. I’ve observed that many of our children can write better than many of those writing on the site.

This early, my daughter has attracted a lot of online friends because of her writing.

But the benefit to us, parents, is knowing their inner thoughts. You don’t have to know you daughter’s password to be able to read her thoughts, as MyLot is open to everyone. In my case, I discovered feelings and assumptions that I never thought my daughter has, such as her dream of having her own room and her fears about our family losing our house to foreclosure, just like what happened to her close friend.

Your child can also earn income as she posts and answers questions. It is not much, but if she has lots of interest in it, she can reach the $10 minimum payout faster. She can be paid through Paypal, but if she’s younger than 18, she can use your Paypal. There’s an article here about Paypal, if you like to know more about Paypal.

Lastly, as you introduce MyLot to your children, advise them not to reveal personal information, such as home address and telephone number, and not to join anything that asks for payment. Since the Internet is becoming a big part of our lives, you might as well capitalize on it or make them ready for it.

You can visit MyLot now and explore.